General Conference

I am so excited for general conference. It only happens twice a year & the best 2 weekends of the year. Well besides the birth of Christ & his Atonement. A wonderful time to hear from out Prophet & the 12 apostles & the messages they have for us. I get excited for the announcements of new temples & just updates the church is doing in the world. So exciting. In church last week our lesson in Relief Society was on preparing for General Conference. I took that lesson to heart this week & pondered & prayed about what I want to get out of it. They encourage us to come with a problem or a question and we can know that it will be answered. I thought long & hard about my problem or question. I can't really go with the question: When will I get to adopt? I don't picture Pres. Monson saying, Sarah P. Thomas on 7/25/10 you will you get your baby. But I thought more of a problem I have. That problem is my Grinch heart. I have a very small, shriveled up heart that my nursing career has sucked dry. I know those are harsh words. But statics say that nurses on average burnout at 3 years. Well I have been a nurse for over 4 years & I can honestly say that is true. People take & take & take, that I just don't have anything more to give. I am talking about my patients, NOT family members or friends. But I am going in wanting to overcome this. I know they say, when you serve them, you will grow to love them. Not the case in nursing. I need my heart to be softened and I need to love serving my patients. I think where the big problem lies, is I don't know if they are sincerely telling me the truth or lying to me to get drugs. It is so hard to discern between my true needy patients & my needy patients. So I treat them all the same. Which I know I shouldn't. I try to think of, what would Jesus do? But I fail with in seconds. I really need to know what to do to love & serve them. So that is my General Conference plan & any other messages my Heavenly Father wants me to hear. I am excited it is over Easter weekend & the talks will most likely be about the sacrifice, resurrection & atonement of Jesus Christ. Which I am so thankful for. It saddens me at time to think the He suffered for my sins, I hope not too many drops of blood. Maybe a paper cut size. But still those are very annoying. But I am thankful for Him & will always appreciate what he did for me & the best example of service. My favorite story from the New Testaments is when Jesus was walking through the streets & this women just wanted to touch the hem of his outfit & she knew if she did that she would be healed. Matthew 9:20-22. The best part is He turned about & when he saw her he said, Daughter, be of good comfort: they faith hath made thee whole. And the woman was made whole from that hour. It is a totally of 3 verse in the bible & they are the strongest for me. I can't tell you how many times, I have wished to just touch a tiny, little bit of his garment. I am excited for this weekend. It will be great and on Monday it is a new day & I can always start over. The hard part will be to stick with it & not just return to my same old shriveled up self. One can hope.