Yes, I said IVF. Thought I wouldn't be saying that for a very long time. But I did. Crazy. Last time I checked hell hasn't frozen over just yet. Today I had my annual apt. Always a favorite in a girls life. One day of the year that you dread but know it is something that you have to do. For me it is a day that reminds me that my organs are very special & need tending. I went in fully expecting to schedule surgery. Lets recap. Two plus years ago I had surgery to figure out why no babies & I was officially diagnosed with endometriosis. Dr. Counts said that I needed to go on 6 months of Lupron injections & then do another more intense surgery to clean out all my yucky stuff. Well my fertility nurse put a stop to that & said no. Lupron can kill a portion of my eggs & decrease getting pregnant through IVF. So after about a year Brad & I decided to try IVF. Well as you know that didn't work & I vowed NEVER to do it again. Lets put it this way, it was the MOST uncomfortable thing I have ever done & hell would be frozen before I would attempt that again. So needless to say Brad & I went to my apt & Dr. Counts talked with us about 2 options. Mostly money related. Do we wants to put money into trying IVF again or do a robotic procedure to clean up my goodies. What a decision. She says NOT to go to previous MD again but to travel to Seattle & have it done down there. Where they will completely knock me out & I wouldn't have to feel the joys of a needle going in & out, in & out, in & out 5x in my ovary with little sedation. Before trying the robotic procedure. So Brad & I left with a lot on our minds. Well we get home & check our mail & yippee.... We got the first, we hope of many, letters from Boise FD. It was the letter telling Brad to fill out the exam acceptance & paying $20 & mailing it back to them. Brad was right on it with filling it out & getting the $20 money order & getting it out in the mail for tomorrow pick-up. Brad & I talked, well actually I talked & Brad listened, about waiting until after the Boise FD application/exam/interview process is over before thinking about IVF. We looked to see if they have a IVF clinic in Boise & they do. We will continue w/adoption & if we go to Boise then we will do the IVF again. But for now we will focus on Boise & pray that my goodies don't get so bad that I will have to have surgery again. Oh, Brad's test will be between May 8th and 22nd. I hoping for a Monday, so he doesn't have to miss work. But they said they won't send the testing letter until the 3rd week of April. Maybe with Brad they will let him know earlier because he needs to travel so far. Again in our life, we wait some more. Nothing new.
Oh, I have to say this. We are reading from the Old Testament in Sunday school & we have just got done w/Genesis. What I have learned was that a few of the great Prophet's wives couldn't conceive. Well when they finally did, they gave birth to great leaders. Soooooo. Maybe I will give birth to the next prophet. HAHAHAHAHA. LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It has been nice to learn from there experiences & how they leaned upon the Lord for support. But I to would laugh like Sarah, if I was told that I would give birth at 99 yrs old.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
So which one should we pray more about?
So I know I haven't written in a while, but I feel that I am always on a soapbox & just complain about my patients. Which by the way have behaved themselves very nicely this week. Maybe they are getting the memo. Well I know one who didn't & she about pushed me over the edge. But I will not go into that, I will just let it go. Things in the nursing field are great & I love the people I work with. They are wonderful people that keep me laughing & wanting to get up every morning at 5.30 am to just laugh & have a great time. In a few weeks is a orthopedic conference in Girdwood & a bunch of us girls are leaving the husband/boyfriends at home & sharing room. It will be fun & I doubt I will get any sleep. If the snow is still good, we are going to go cross country skiing. This will last 2 minutes because, A: I am out of shape & B: Because I will probably fall every 2 seconds. I am getting excited & am looking forward to the conference.
Alright to the title of the blog. Prayer. Prayer is a funny thing. I kneel down by my bed about every night & I think about it before I pour out my heart & soul. What is so different about tonight's prayer then last nights. I try not to pray about the same thing. However, I actually do, but attempt to word it different. I wonder if he gets tired of me praying about this or that, or if he is really saying ENOUGH, have patience's I will answer it. It remind me of a child saying repeatedly, please, please, pretty please, please with a cherry on top. I always have to chuckle. But every night I kneel down & do pray for certain things about every night. One of course being adoption, but now it is something else that is big. In fact, so big I am about to put the adoption prayer on hold & focus on this. Alright here it is. I don't know if I wrote about Brad applying to the Boise Fire Department. Well if I didn't here you go. A few months ago, Brad & I were talking about fire fighting jobs & with the economy the way it is & getting to old to apply. Anchorage probably won't hire for like a million years with all the cuts they are making. So on with the story. We were looking at departments in Seattle WA, Portland OR & I even looked at SLC. Crazy I know. But Brad mentioned something about Boise, ID. So why not look & low & behold they were testing this year. Brad decided to fill out there employee interest card & that the closing date for that would be March 15th. Soooooooooooo, finally after waiting for like forever, it finally closed. Now we just want for the letter on where & when the test is & Brad will be off to take that test. They do a few things different then Anchorage. He doesn't fill out an application until after he passes the test. Then he fills out the application & goes to do an interview. Then if he passes the interview then he goes & takes all the other test & then he is ranked & put on a list. Then Boise will pull from the list when there are positions to fill. At this time we are praying to be put on the list. The list is good for 2 years. I am excited & very nervous about even thinking of moving. But right now we just need to focus on one thing at a time. His written exam. It will be in May sometime. When he passes that, then we will worry about the application & interview. So the big question is, do we pray for 2 big/huge things or do we just focus on one thing at a time. I do want to adopt really bad, but I want Brad to make BFD more. Mostly because it will benefit our family. I can focus on being a stay at home mom, if I have the patience's or not. I think it would open the doors for our family if Brad was able to make it on. Of course my mother-in-law would be thrilled to have Brad closer. Even though he doesn't really talk to his family. No fighting, just Brad doesn't talk. It is his fault completely. He is the quiet one. I feel so bad for Heavenly Father & my prayers. He has to giggle when I phone in. Now the blog will now be geared to Brad's journey to the Boise Fire Department. I really hope & pray it happens. I know our family will be so blessed. I know that there is a plan out there for us. Yes we dictate which way that plan will go through our free agency, but I know if we live the gospel worthily & do what we need to do & pay our tithing that our choices will take us to the plan the He wants for us. It is very hard to think about moving, especially moving away from my amazing nieces, who of course I adore. But I know it is something that needs to be done for the sake of our family. Now we just pray & do our best & leave the rest to Him.
Alright to the title of the blog. Prayer. Prayer is a funny thing. I kneel down by my bed about every night & I think about it before I pour out my heart & soul. What is so different about tonight's prayer then last nights. I try not to pray about the same thing. However, I actually do, but attempt to word it different. I wonder if he gets tired of me praying about this or that, or if he is really saying ENOUGH, have patience's I will answer it. It remind me of a child saying repeatedly, please, please, pretty please, please with a cherry on top. I always have to chuckle. But every night I kneel down & do pray for certain things about every night. One of course being adoption, but now it is something else that is big. In fact, so big I am about to put the adoption prayer on hold & focus on this. Alright here it is. I don't know if I wrote about Brad applying to the Boise Fire Department. Well if I didn't here you go. A few months ago, Brad & I were talking about fire fighting jobs & with the economy the way it is & getting to old to apply. Anchorage probably won't hire for like a million years with all the cuts they are making. So on with the story. We were looking at departments in Seattle WA, Portland OR & I even looked at SLC. Crazy I know. But Brad mentioned something about Boise, ID. So why not look & low & behold they were testing this year. Brad decided to fill out there employee interest card & that the closing date for that would be March 15th. Soooooooooooo, finally after waiting for like forever, it finally closed. Now we just want for the letter on where & when the test is & Brad will be off to take that test. They do a few things different then Anchorage. He doesn't fill out an application until after he passes the test. Then he fills out the application & goes to do an interview. Then if he passes the interview then he goes & takes all the other test & then he is ranked & put on a list. Then Boise will pull from the list when there are positions to fill. At this time we are praying to be put on the list. The list is good for 2 years. I am excited & very nervous about even thinking of moving. But right now we just need to focus on one thing at a time. His written exam. It will be in May sometime. When he passes that, then we will worry about the application & interview. So the big question is, do we pray for 2 big/huge things or do we just focus on one thing at a time. I do want to adopt really bad, but I want Brad to make BFD more. Mostly because it will benefit our family. I can focus on being a stay at home mom, if I have the patience's or not. I think it would open the doors for our family if Brad was able to make it on. Of course my mother-in-law would be thrilled to have Brad closer. Even though he doesn't really talk to his family. No fighting, just Brad doesn't talk. It is his fault completely. He is the quiet one. I feel so bad for Heavenly Father & my prayers. He has to giggle when I phone in. Now the blog will now be geared to Brad's journey to the Boise Fire Department. I really hope & pray it happens. I know our family will be so blessed. I know that there is a plan out there for us. Yes we dictate which way that plan will go through our free agency, but I know if we live the gospel worthily & do what we need to do & pay our tithing that our choices will take us to the plan the He wants for us. It is very hard to think about moving, especially moving away from my amazing nieces, who of course I adore. But I know it is something that needs to be done for the sake of our family. Now we just pray & do our best & leave the rest to Him.
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