tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32187400363808155532024-03-13T10:18:20.354-07:00The TALL and short of it AllAK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.comBlogger64125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-52012392674126587812012-03-17T23:41:00.002-07:002012-03-18T00:14:23.891-07:00Been AwhileMy sister-in-law Michelle says she checks my blog everyday for an update. It has been a while & this is for her. You would think I should just call her to tell her how we are doing & to see how they are doing. The problem is by the time we are able or think about it, it is to late & I am sure everyone is in bed. Hate this time zone stuff. We do think of our family close & far & hope that all is going well. So on to the update.<div>We will start with Madilyn because of course she is the most important:):) She is doing fabulously. She is growing like a weed, a very pretty weed. She is walking, running & talking. She can says Hi, Bye, Boot, Doggie, Baby, Mommy, Daddy, Thank You, I love you, Cracker & of course NO! She can sign more, please & milk. She loves to listen to music. We will give her our iphones with music playing & she will walk around the house just dancing & singing. It is so precious. This girl won't sit still for anything. She is constantly moving & we like it. She doesn't watch TV, which I LOVE!!! She does like to stand on the stool & watch me bake. Well actually she loves to get into our silverware drawer & pull out all the spoons & forks & pretend she is stirring something. She has to be everywhere we are & has to know what is going on at all times. We are waiting patiently for the snow to melt to go out & play. This summer better be an Indian summer & no rain. I think as much snow we have gotten this winter it should make up for no rain this summer. We live next to a park & we will be living there. I think we should just have our mail forwarded there:). She is so much fun & we love her to pieces.</div><div>On to Brad, he is now a courier & is liking it. He is actually hoping to become an electrician. He is on a waiting list for a school & hopes to be picked up this summer to start training/learning the ropes. It is long process & we just have to be patient. He would do a great job. He has a great mind for that kind of work & a good work ethic. The down fall of this line of work is he maybe out of town for work. But such is life in Alaska. If that doesn't work out, FedEx is a great company. Time will only tell. But that is my Brad.</div><div>Now on to me. Well since the last post I had surgery. Which of course has been great since & loving it & happy I did it. That is that. For me the biggest change was switching jobs last May. I wanted to spend more time with Madilyn & less time at work. So I went back to the hospital & this time doing what I want to do. I am now a mother baby nurse working days. LOVE IT!!! I am so happy with the change & so is our family. I still work full time but now only work three days instead of five. It is hard sometimes to work 12-hour shifts, but knowing I get four days off with my Madilyn is the best. Also my calling in the church keeps me busy. I am now the 1st counselor in the Stake RS Presidency. I was secretary for 4 yrs & was moved to 1st counselor. We have Women's Conference coming up in April & am so excited for it. Lots of fun. I work with fabulous women that have been & are great examples to me. Anything else. Nope.</div><div>The dogs are dogs. Lucy & Abigail are so good with Madilyn & they are getting so fat thanks to Madilyn feeding them her food! </div><div>Life is good & couldn't be any happier. We are thankful for the blessings we have received & are excited to see what fun things are ahead for us. </div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-18652052840664339552011-02-13T22:45:00.000-08:002011-02-13T23:46:51.706-08:00SurgeryAs my maternity leave is ending (BOOOOOO!!!!!) I should blog about what happened exactly in Bend, OR. I know a lot of people knew that I was having surgery & what it was all about. But for those that had no idea & want to know what really went down, here you go. I am first going to start with where we stayed. It was heaven. We stayed in these cute little cottages called: <a href="http://bendcottages.com/">Bend Cottages</a>. It was like staying in at home, but cozier & my mother-in-law was there & that helped out TONS. The nice thing was they give you a discount for having surgery with Dr. Redwine & it cost just as much as a hotel, but better. I feel in love with Bend. I joked with my family that if I loved it I would not return. While we where there it was in the 50's & sunny & wonderful. Oh & it was well below zero in Alaska. But I always fall back with the saying, the grass isn't always greener on the other side. But at least there is grass & NO snow or freezing temps. The people there said this is VERY unusually warm for this part of the year. Brad said it maybe Heavenly Father telling us something. Like it is time to move:) In the end we did come back. But Bend was wonderful:)<div>Ok, on to the surgery. I had a preop on 1/17/11 with <a href="http://www.endometriosissurgeon.com/">Dr. Redwine</a>. Side note there will be a lot of TMI in this post, so beware. We meet him & he was very nice. He started out needing to do an exam. Nothing like breaking the ice with a women's FAVORITE exam. I will tell you that would be my most painful exam in my life. I about came off the table. Brad ended up getting from his seat to do something. There was a nurse there to help hold be down & oh I screamed out. The nice thing was when he was leaving the room he said that would be the last time I would feel that. I was so excited to hear that. We then went into his office & described what he found in the exam & what his plans where going to be. He would get rid of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Endometriosis">endometriosis</a>, possible bowel resection, cutting this one nerve & then he had to add another procedure because he thinks that it eroded through to may vagina. Good times. That is the TMI. But it gets worse, so if you don't want to know this side of me stop reading NOW!!! After that we went to go get my meds filled. I had to have a bowel prep in case he need to do bowel surgery. I hope to NEVER have a bowel prep again. The worse thing I have ever drank, it has now topped my barium drink while in high school. It was horrible!!! The next day was my surgery. My surgery was at 1200 pm & we had to check in at 1000 am. They did all the fun stuff of IVs & a million questions & then I was ready to get wheeled back. The funny part was the anesthesiologist wheeled me back. I asked if they are trying to save money or are they short staffed. He said no that is what it is. He was the nicest man ever. I got situated on the lovely table & the doctor started giving me meds & then I was out. What felt like a minute later I was in recovery. But in reality four hours later I was in recovery. My mouth was so dry. The first thing I heard was the surgery was more in depth & that I needed to stay in the hospital over night. I was like ok. In & out of sleep. Brad would be in my room waiting for me. About an hour later I was taken to my room. I had a Foley catheter in as well as a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jackson-Pratt_drain">JP drain</a>. This is all new to me. I felt like I had a huge surgery not some little laparoscopic procedure. Anyway. The nurses that took care of me where WONDERFUL. They were so nice. Dr. Redwine ended up doing a full thickness bowel resection of my sigmoid. He says I had a hole. Nice. I was put on a full liquid diet & could advance as tolerated. I was doing well with water & soda & then I was able to have a chocolate milk shake. OH HEAVEN!!!! I had a total of three while I was there. It was the best thing I have ever eaten. My body was jumping for joy. I had no nausea issues thanks to the patch that was behind my ear for nausea. I would write it but don't know how to spell it. I was sore & had so much fun trying to switch positions. I will say being an ortho nurse helped on this because I knew so many techniques that I was able to do it by my self & no bother the nurses. The worse was my Foley. He had to do surgery to the out side of my bladder & I think with having a Foley & it moving, I would get the worse bladder spasms. I drained A LOT from my JP drain, but that is because he flushes out the abdomen so much. Over all the night went very well. The next day I got to experience the removal of a Foley AND a JP drain. I have removed dozens of these in patients but not on myself. The funny part was the nurses said the same thing that I say in the same situation. Now take a deep breath & here we go. Ya. Painful. Not fun & I am sorry for all my patients that I did that to. KARMA!!! My doctor did rounds & he said that the endometriosis was worse then he expected. I had it all the way up on my diaphragm & just basically everywhere. He says that he got it all & that I should feel a huge difference. This is what he did:</div><div>- Laparoscopy. Excision of endometriosis of lower diaphragm & electrodesiccation of superficial endometriosis of the posterior diaphragm.</div><div>- Presacral neurectomy (cutting the nerve to my uterus to help with cramps)</div><div>- Excision of extensive endometriosis</div><div>- En block resection of pelvic floor for treatment of complete obliteration of the cul-de-sac.</div><div>- Bilateral ovarian cystectomies</div><div>- Full-thickness resection of sigmoid for sigmoid nodule of endometriosis</div><div>- Bilateral ovarian suspensions</div><div>Sounds like a lot, yes it was. Here are some pictures of before & afterwards. They are graphic so be prepared.</div><div><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 307px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiB2UCVb7YYNkiieufW4ko1wjnQnn83JXev5wyoYW9rSL3WJo-axhRkjVZLR3u3JvT50PmbeRjvdij1hNqbIfpof3u5zFi1Wr_qbNfsCRKxVvt6qFWu5IZS6LVHx7f-UWku3Wf0ZsU2Nuk/s400/Image2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5573443720292077538" /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 307px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd6H7A6RAhUHr3l6eLggJr0HVJDcyTcLB5fq8CfTB7oly_JySKg_BUyX3NKB-vOzWgus2o7McG4tiMmT-z2VHVkfsNkZplEK7avPn7teTdLofhUkJLe5N8HA3Q1imRBaPPvliFtPDT5Q4/s400/Image3.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5573443725553892786" /></div><div>Sorry there is a big gap between picture & the next sentence. Has to do with scanning. But anyway it looks like he put lighter fluid in there & then lit a watch. It looks worse then it feels. So the biggest question on every bodies mind is can I get pregnant. Dr. Redwine says if I still can't get pregnant I can't blame endometriosis any more. There is something else that will be causing it. Are we going to try. Yes, but not until Madilyn is a year old. The girl that referred me to him didn't get pregnant for another two years. So I don't have my hopes set up for a right away pregnancy, but also I don't have my hopes up that it will happen. I like adopting. No physical pain just emotional. Is there anything else that I am missing. Nope. It went good & I am very thankful for what he did. I have already seen a huge difference & it is wonderful. I am also VERY thankful for insurance. This surgery & hospital stay will come close to $30,000. WOW!!! That isn't even our housing, flights, car rental or food. Brad has great insurance & I am very thankful. I am extremely thankful for my mother-in-law Laurie for being there for us & especially for Madilyn. Thank you. I was put on some pretty strict limitations. I am not to lift over 20 lbs, go up & downs stairs (sparingly), house work or any really physical labor for six weeks. Good times. Over all I am following it. But the whole lifting thing when you have a baby in a car seat only last about three & half weeks. But the other stuff I have followed pretty well. The flight home went really well. We upgraded to first class. That was awesome. The church really stepped in & helped with meals & anything else that I maybe in need of. The food was awesome & an answer to so many prayers. Thank you.</div><div>To end this. I have to say thank you to my Heaven Father. He was there the whole time let alone guided us & protected us every where we went. We have been truly blessed during my maternity leave. I can't tell you how many blessing we have received. There are too many to count. We are very thankful for the blessing of paying our tithing. We know we only give 10%, but he truly gives up 110%. I know that He lives & answers our prayer. He is there when we need him & even when we don't think we do. We are a very blessed family. Madilyn did amazing the entire two weeks of vacation. Thank you again to everyone that has been there for us. We couldn't have done it without you. </div><div><br /></div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-31775526739089184772011-02-01T11:12:00.001-08:002011-02-01T14:40:08.025-08:00ChildrenToday I have been thinking & I will warn anybody that reads this will most likely be offended or annoyed with me. How am I going to raise Madilyn or any other children that will grace our lovely home. This has come more to me now with what has been going on in the media. There is a mom is Alaska that has been charge with ONE count of child abuse for putting hot sauce in the child mouth & making him take a cold shower. I will tell you now that I am not siding with her or agreeing with what she did, but I will say that I am TOTALLY annoyed with every ones quick judgement on her. In fact I am fired up over peoples quick guilty verdict. I will confess I had hot sauce put in my mouth as a child by my babysit for saying a VERY bad word at her house. The thing was that was a consequence for swearing. If you swear you get hot sauce. She followed through with it & didn't just make up some excuse not to punish me. Empty threats! I remember it & I learned from it. Do I have nightmares from it or some psychological issues, no. Did I swear again, yes, but NOT in her home:) I don't know how Brad & I are going to raise or punish our children. I think each child will probably be different, because what may work for one may not work for the other. I have so many thought about this issue & what I hate is people say oh you are a bad mother for doing that. The sad thing is kids now a days are spoiled rotten brats. Not all of them, but a huge chunk of them are. I swear when I hear kids tell their parents off & the parents do nothing, I want to smack the parents & say are you serious. You are the parent not them. Kids think of themselves as equal to adults & don't give them the respect. What happened to thank you & please & MEANING it. I have to commend this women, when she asked her son what happens when you lie, he said I get hot sauce & guess what she followed through. How many moms or dads say, when I count to three you will be sorry. Then I hear 1-2-3 at least a dozen times & nothing happens. Kids need to have boundaries & consequences. Be it time out or going to your room or what ever don't be afraid to follow through. Your kids will still love you. I have to say I loved that my parents followed through on EVERYTHING with our punishments. Of course mine was spankings with a wooden spoon. But my mom did it. But of course before she did it she went into her room cooled off & I was sent to my room. She would come down & talk about what I did wrong & then she would spank me. She followed through. Now I am not saying you need to spank but at least follow through. Oh & the other thing is childhood obesity. This women was punished for hot sauce & people say the long lasting affect that will be on him. But think about all the parents that have children that are obese & there long last affect mentally & physically. I think they should be charged for neglect & mental abuse. I love hearing parents wanting to sue McDonald's for making Happy Meals enticing with toys & making there children obese. HELLO just say NO!!!! McDonald's didn't force you to drive to McDonald's to buy & then force it down their throat. Really come on people. I have great examples of being a great parent. I hope that Brad & I can take their examples into mind with raising our children. But before you judge a parent for their actions maybe you should look at yourself & realize you aren't perfect either!!!<div>AND one last thing. This women went to Dr. Phil to get help & because of it she is being charged. There are, I am sure, tons of women out there that are like her that don't know what to do. Maybe instead of charging her we should say to those in her same situation that there is help. Because WHO now is going to come out & say they do the same thing & they need help with fears of charges & jail time. Instead, here are the places you can go. Lets change the behavior of the parent & the child together in a humane way... I am just saying!<br /><div><div>Sorry this is everywhere of a post. But I had to say something:)<br /><div><br /></div></div></div></div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-45806151738802850452010-12-31T21:08:00.000-08:002010-12-31T21:22:46.907-08:00Happy New YearAnother year has come & gone. Crazy how fast it goes. I am afraid now that it will just continue to go faster now that I am a mom. Well that is what I have heard. 2010 has been a great year with ups & downs & just in between. The great trial has been adoption, but that to has been our great blessing. We have experience both sorrow & true happiness. I like to focus more on our happiness of <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Madilyn</span>. Which, by the way is growing like a weed. Before you know it she will be talking & walking. Now she just eats & sleeps, with a few diapers in between. I am thankful for the time that Brad & I had alone, but am more thankful that we get to start this new adventure together. 2011 will bring great stories as well as learning experiences. It will be interesting to see what they will be. I do know the beginning will have us traveling to Grace, ID & introducing <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Madilyn</span> to the Grandparents & then off to Bend, OR for me to get sliced & diced. Other then that the last 11 months will be a mystery. I use to make new years <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">resolutions</span> and I would actually keep them, shocking I know. But I haven't a clue. Maybe I will make my goal list when my brain is fully functional & then I can make realistic goals. I love goals & how they can change your life for good. I love it. But I am happy for this year & know it will be a great one. I am thankful for 2010 & the blessings & challenges that have been presented. I am <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">especially</span> thankful for my family & friends & the support they gave Brad & I. I am eternally grateful. I have the best family & friends EVER. Thank you. So on to 2011!!!<div><br /></div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-38876883673318683812010-12-16T21:53:00.000-08:002010-12-16T22:18:42.774-08:0017 day<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg208r1DlX032aLOjmb5E_0sXTwzZoVJVjo4xM5YHbO9er25ntiMkueiu6a9-rg3b-F0FPzyzy-PhuSGO_4piB3N3l9An75sufes0r5E0CB1Wo6fGEESKWTvVH_wTE4C3h7_fLe2aQ7sCU/s1600/DSCN0855.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg208r1DlX032aLOjmb5E_0sXTwzZoVJVjo4xM5YHbO9er25ntiMkueiu6a9-rg3b-F0FPzyzy-PhuSGO_4piB3N3l9An75sufes0r5E0CB1Wo6fGEESKWTvVH_wTE4C3h7_fLe2aQ7sCU/s200/DSCN0855.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5551530607209838242" /></a><br />Ms. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Madilyn</span> Ray is 17 days old & has changed so much. She is still my little cutie & she is getting more & more fun to be around. She had an apt today for her 2 wk check up. She now weighs 8 lbs even & is 21 1/4 inches. She is growing like a weed. She is so fun to watch. My favorite time is when she is done eating & she is asleep & she will make these amazing faces. She will first start out with a one side smile then it will turn into a full blown smile & her dimples will just shine. She likes to sleep with her hands in fist up by her face or across her chest at first, but when she deep into sleep her arms are above her head & she will stay like that for about 2-3 hrs. Then when she is about to wake you see this little fist shot straight up in the sky & you will hear this little groan & then the second fist goes up & they come down slowly. Then when she is <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">hungry</span> & she is rooting & trying to suck what ever is in sight then she will make this tight little ring with her lips & just stare off into the distant & then relax until her cute little lips feel the sweet warm taste (actually <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">disgusting</span>) formula. She has the funnest burps that smell <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">disgusting</span> that when she does them in my face, I want to throw up. Then when she sneezes they are always in 3, just like me, and her whole body gets into it. She is a doll & we have fallen head over heals for her. Not so much at her 5 o'clock feeding, but she is still out little love. We are so very blessed to have her in our life. She is a dream come true. We can't thank Heavenly Father enough with this treasure. We pray that we can live up to his standard, let alone the birth mothers. We can't even express the gratitude we have for her. She is amazing & we are truly blessed to know her. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Madilyn</span> is loved in so many ways. <div>We have high hopes for her. I talk with <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Madilyn</span> every night about her future & hope that she will make great choices. I know I shouldn't post this, but the other day we were watching 16 & pregnant & one of the couples I wanted to kill them both, especially the father. I told <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Madilyn</span> if she brought home a guy like that I was going to cut his dick off & sew her vagina shut. She just looked at me. You know they are never to young to have these types of talks. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">HAHAHA</span>!!!! AND she can't talk back & say, MOM!!!!! I have her total attention. The question is: Will she remember? Nope. There is nothing wrong day dreaming about her future. We pray that she will be strong in the gospel & marries a great man who can take her to temple & treat her like a queen that she is:) A mom & dad can daydream, can't we!</div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-90531608738627441032010-12-08T21:41:00.000-08:002010-12-09T10:41:09.449-08:00Madilyn Ray ThomasBorn 11/29/10 in Anchorage, Alaska at 6:52 am<div>7 lbs & 4 oz, 20 inches long & a head full of hair</div><div><br /></div><div><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-BmHkPE3IgTeh0x_UlIYwbvMcavcOAG4RrTsQ7n_Vuktngmv3o4_qLxj65Zr_P7EaPjDOup9YFQOISZJVqQnISjsO0QaPHJi_WcbwdPfM16UH4-v0BiGPbqs0gguNc8WuBd5-uMvoGQE/s200/DSCN0819.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5548554599350432434" /></div><div><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjx2_b-MZv3O21fM3rWVlrCDKyDMMZRM50YDiu_8O_i7hBUicnHdmDMOak5DxzJQU1dFcLVBs6jOOO0NG-rwS5onwCzP89iyJHjX0RehJ0UY8ESfTEnC1cPxpDxnNHVt6_-TOI8fDwrkc/s200/DSCN0843.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5548555357650449794" /></div><div><br /></div><div> Now the story. We have adopted a little girl. We wanted to announce it on the 29th, but we have learned from past experience to wait the 10 days before making it known. It has been 10 days & ta-da we have a little girl. We have known about this for awhile, but wanted to keep in on the down low. She is amazing & we love her so much. She has the cutest dimples known to man. I have always wanted to have a little girl with dimples. She is a really good baby that loves her binkie. She is full of expressions & my favorite time is when she is done eating & is asleep & she will start to smile so big & her dimples just shine. We love her so much & are so very thankful. We couldn't have this blessing if it wasn't for the her birthmother. We are very grateful for her & this hard choice. Thank you just doesn't seem enough. She is wonderful & we pray that she will know how much we appreciate her. We are very thankful right now again for this little, but huge blessing. We know that Heavenly Father has been there for us through all of this & we are thankful for Him. We are so grateful & so HAPPY!!!! But here she is, our little Madilyn.</div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-23333861331669521072010-09-26T11:17:00.000-07:002010-09-26T12:00:33.661-07:00Hello! Hello!Do you ever wonder if your life was a musical what song would be playing though out the day. I wonder that & sometime I actually live it. One of my favorite songs that I play often in my mind when people want something or I am in an issue that I want out is the song from Black Eye Peas: Just shut up!!! I have it on my Ipod & I play it at work ALL the time. I wish at times that my life could be Glee & I can break out in song & dance & my life will be so much better. But not so. Anyway, I don't think people would want to hear me sing, let alone dance all day anyway. <br />A lot has been going on since the last time I have posted. I will start with adoption. Actually there isn't too much to write about. As of right now she still wants to place & she is due Dec. 5th. She did say at one time she wanted to meet us & we gave her sometimes & it didn't happen. The nice thing is she is the one contacting LDS Family Services & still tells them she wants to place. From what we have learn she is very quiet. Maybe it is a good thing we don't meet. I would probably break out in song & dance & she would go running for the hills. We would love to get excited but we hold back. We aren't going to name her until 11 days after she is born, because we will know she will be ours. Soooooo:):) We are going to call her a different name each day & see if one sticks. We may end up with a daughter named Bertha or Bubba. No, names we have thought of are Megan, Claire, Olivia, Sophia, Lilianna or whatever comes to mind. The nice thing is there is no hurry & we can have fun. I think we will start pacing in mid November. Our caseworker says that we will probably get a phone call telling us she is here & come get her. Which we don't mind. This adoption is so different from Aiden's. I kind of like it. The only probably is we won't really have any stories to tell this little girl about her birthparents. Not like with Aiden where we could tell him so many fun things about his birthmother. That is it for adoption.<br />Now on to the next exciting news. Ok, you may not think it is that exciting, but I sure do. The reason why I can't get pregnant is because of endometriosis. It is a crappy disease or what ever it is, it is CRAP & NOT FUN. You can google it. But this is how I describe it. It is chickweed. If you don't know what chickweed is, it is this 3 clove stuff that grows on your lawns. It is easy to pull up BUT it grows back even more & it is annoying. Well that is what I have. The only way that I have been taught to treat this stuff is to go in & burn it off. Well like chickweed the roots are still there & it will grow back & even more & then on top of that you can get adhesions. The adhesions is what has my ovaries, uterus & colan adhering together. So much fun. My doctor in Alaska gave us 2 options, 1. do a robotic procedure to go burn some more off or 2. do IVF. She says we need to know where we want our money to go. We didn't make our mind up, we just said ok we will adopted & if it gets bad enough we will have another operation. WELL:):) A couple of months ago I meet a girl that has the same problem & she told me about a doctor in Bend OR that specializes in endometriosis & instead of burning it off, he goes in & cuts out ALL of it. In fact we he doesn't leave the area until it is ALL gone. I went home & googled him & was impressed with his results & his research. I had to get all my medical records together & ship them to him & see what he says. He wrote back & says that I can come down & have surgery with him. I was thrilled. I called & scheduled surgery for Jan. 18th & booked our housing in these cute cottages. We are going to Bend OR. I can't even tell you how excited I am to get this stuff out of my body. This is were I break out in song: I am so excited!!! I will tell you this is not a fun thing to have. I pray it works. I am tired of being in pain. We picked January & not sooner, is because if we adopt then I will still be on FMLA & won't have to worry about vacation because I will already be on it. I am not looking forward to flying but you have to do what you have to do to get the medical care that you need.<br />The next song I would be singing right now is a hymn from church: Count your blessings name them one by one, count your blessings see what God has done. I am thankful for the blessing that I have received. I know at times Brad & I could have thrown in the towel, but we know that He is with us & has not nor ever turn his back on us, so we won't either. He is our Father in Heaven & He wants the very best for us & loves us dearly. We thank Him everyday & can't even express the gratitude. Thank you:)AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-34334417525672967522010-08-16T20:39:00.000-07:002010-08-16T21:04:47.870-07:00Lucy<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Lucy, what can I say about her. She is our eldest Westie & is a beast. She goes by many names, Lubers, Gubers & then we combine them at times & call her Luber Guber, then there is Luce, Goose & on occasion McGruber. Well now we can add fierce bird hunter. My sweet, so we thought, Lucy has in fact caught a bird. </span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Today Brad got up early & decided to go for a run. Which by the way, he doesn't do very often, if at all. But today was the day. The weather of course in Alaska is, well, let me just say, IT SUCKS!!!! Brad & the pups we running very nicely & enjoying the wonderful morning. When all of a sudden Brad startled this little bird which in turn tried to get awhile, but wasn't quick enough for my little fast acting beast to bite down with her oh so powerful jaws. Yes, our sweet Innocent (so we thought) little Lucy got her first bird. So there is Lucy with the head of the bird in her mouth & the wings & body flaring every which way & Lucy chewing. In a half a second Brad in his amazement yelled at Lucy to drop the bird, then he jerked on the leash & said come on. Lucy then dropped the bird & away she went. Have no idea if it is dead or alive. Brad says that when Lucy came home she was just so proud of herself. So for all you Alaska birds, even you Eagles, watch out, because Lucy is on the prowl.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">That is my Lucy... Isn't she just so wonderful!!! Oh & that is our other not so fierce Abigail.</span><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy06IzFnHXfRXnPcJenS3pXhk_GjwYg3z_YDsYZXDy25dAn0RmoMd1U-ciUwawMUsA_tAAgoi34euUaFI6A9qQjdEsTfFd-x1sjQW8f8JG5Oj3ABDOTsJHOoh_ONWBBOl4CJYkS4xAreM/s1600/IMG_0514.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 150px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5506222353486080914" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy06IzFnHXfRXnPcJenS3pXhk_GjwYg3z_YDsYZXDy25dAn0RmoMd1U-ciUwawMUsA_tAAgoi34euUaFI6A9qQjdEsTfFd-x1sjQW8f8JG5Oj3ABDOTsJHOoh_ONWBBOl4CJYkS4xAreM/s200/IMG_0514.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy06IzFnHXfRXnPcJenS3pXhk_GjwYg3z_YDsYZXDy25dAn0RmoMd1U-ciUwawMUsA_tAAgoi34euUaFI6A9qQjdEsTfFd-x1sjQW8f8JG5Oj3ABDOTsJHOoh_ONWBBOl4CJYkS4xAreM/s1600/IMG_0514.jpg"></a>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-42748682833543082082010-08-08T18:44:00.000-07:002010-08-08T20:22:34.457-07:00WorthI haven't written in awhile & mostly because nothing much has been going on in our life. We haven't heard from either birthmother. Esther, we will probably never hear from her again, which is sad but true. Birthmother #2 hasn't written either, but not to worry, she may not want to & we will hear from her in Nov/Dec when she is due. Which will be nice from Aiden's experience. We just got too attached to Esther & we are fine with the next birthmother not getting to know us. We just want her to know that she will never have to worry about the little girl because there will be so many people that will love her beyond life it self, especially us. We will try not to get our hopes up too much, but it will be hard. I will confess, I did by a dress:):) Couldn't resist. It was on sale & oh so cute. But that is all I am going buy, hopefully! We will wait, like always.<br />Today in church, well in Sunday school we are learning about Proverbs & Ecclesiastes & I would love to say I was paying attention through the whole lesson, but I wasn't. I have a VERY short attention span & it is about 2 seconds. The 2 seconds I paid attention to was Proverbs 31:10-31. A virtuous women is priced above rubies. This made me think, now that we may have a possibility on adopting a little girl, how to instill in this little girl that she worth more then rubies or all the diamonds in the world. Then it made me think why women think they are worth the cost of fools gold or a ring out of a cracker jacks box. I want her to know her worth. I want her to know that she is so much more then the label in her clothes or what a man says to her. I hate when I see commercials/movies/TV & this women is flaunting around in nothing & thinking the only reason a man is with her is because of how little her skirt is or how big her boobs are. Also the worth of a women is not define by how powerful she is in the world or how many degrees she may hold. A women who is worth more then anything in the world is a women who stays true to herself & knowing that she is a daughter of God. Now I know that life can throw ugly punches. Believe me I could tell you all kind of stories about my life & the way that I was treated. I have felt like I was worthless & that I wouldn't amount to anything in the world. But it wasn't till I truly realized that I am worth more, that I am worth so much more in my Heavenly Father's eye. We are truly his children & especially his daughters. I am sure he weeps when he sees how women are portrayed. I want my daughter to know how much she is worth & that when a boy comes & treats her like poo that she can bounce back & say, NO I AM WORTH so much MORE!!!! I can tell you when I was younger & when I was told I was ugly or other colorful words that I believed them & let it get to me. I wasted so many tears & guilt thinking I was nothing. How I don't want my daughter to go through that. My nieces are heading into those sensitive years & how I want them to know how great they are. I want them to say they are beautiful & worth more then what they see on TV or what there friends are doing. I want them to live in the perfect bubble that will never hurt them. But I know that will never happen, but I can only pray & teach them that they are amazing little girls & to not give up. The fight is good. The fight to be a virtuous women is the hardest thing a girl will do. But the war is a hard war but it will have an amazing finish when it has been won. I know that Heaven Father loves us all, that he wants us to be so happy. I know that he gets sad when we make poor choices, but I can promise you this, he is the biggest cheerleader out there when you do make a good choice. He is cheering us on & giving us words of encouragement. All through the bible & book of Mormon he talks about how blessed we will be when we choice the right. I will continue the fight & I pray in the end I will be able to go before the Lord & say I did it & I did it with your help.AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-41140083265707434282010-07-20T18:36:00.000-07:002010-07-20T20:39:05.701-07:00Have you ever?Have you ever wanted something so bad that every part of your body hurts. I thought I felt that way sometimes in my life. When I was in high school I wanted to go to Rick's College in Rexburg, ID. I wanted it so very badly, but low & behold I didn't get excepted & I instead went to Dixie College & LOVED it. When I was on my mission I wanted to learn the language so that I could properly bare my testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel & how amazing Heavenly Father's plan is for us. I will tell you it didn't happen over night, but I did learn it & I was able to tell people how amazing things are. When I was in nursing school & my final for pharmacology was the breaking point on passing or not. I studied my butt off & I wanted & prayed so hard that I would be able to do well & continue with my classmates to the next semester. But no I didn't pass & I survived. There are so many other experiences in my life that I wanted something so bad that did or didn't happen. Not until now that I realized that I have NEVER wanted this more then anything in the world. It kills me, my body & heart all ache at once. I never knew I could feel this way & I wonder when it will end. You guessed it, it is about adoption. HAHAHAHA!!! Adoption is what rules a huge chunk of Brad & I's life. We live & breath adoption. In fact I think when we finally do adopt, I don't know what we will talk about. Oh, probably our amazing children.<br />Let me take you back about 2 wks, it was a Friday. Brad & I were having dinner & watching TV, nothing exciting, just relaxing. Well my phone chimed & it was a text from Esther asking how we were doing. I was shocked. Our mouths just dropped. We thought that was odd. We were kind of getting to the point of excepting the fact we may not get Aiden back. We chatted for a little bit & then she asked if we could do lunch when she got back from Hawaii. She said she was getting back on Monday (a week ago). She also asked if we wanted to attempt to do a babysitting transition. I hope I explain. We would babysit, then return him, then babysit & then do sleepovers until Esther was prepared to let him go. I know it sounds strange, but we are more then flexible & willing to work with her. This doesn't happen with most adoption, if any. The thought about getting Aiden back was amazing. It was so hard to contain ourselves. We chatted some more over the weekend. We were very hopefully she would contact us. Well Monday came & went & no contact. That is ok. She was traveling. I thought maybe she would write on Tuesday. Nope. But this is were the story gets so interest. Hope you can follow. At work that day I was checking my email & low & behold ANOTHER birth mother contacted us. I hate to say it, but I started laughing. I totally thought Heavenly Father HAS to have a sense of humor. It was a VERY nice letter. Saying she heard our story & she would love for us to adopt her baby. She is about 21ish weeks pregnant. I really thought that we were on candid camera & someone was going to jump out behind the bushes & say hello!!! We kind of figured she was due about December. So now the thought of two adoption. Crazy. They would be 6 months apart. Oh, my heart just soared with joy. I prayed that this one would be a girl & we would be done. A boy & a girl. Couldn't be any happier. Again we didn't hear anything that night. We wrote the new birth mother back & told her how excited we are to adopt in Dec. Wednesday was a quiet day. No responses from either. That night I texted Esther saying, Welcome back... Hope the flight was well. Did you want to do lunch this weekend. As of today we have heard nothing. The new birth mother wrote us on Friday morning, I think, saying that she is having a little girl & she is due Dec. 5th. Crazy. We wrote her back telling how excited we are & can't wait. Told her if she wanted to meet or wanted to know anything more, to let us know.<br />SOOOO!!! Here we are, two birth mothers & two very (hopefully) possibilities to adopt. One probably more then the other. We still hadn't heard from Esther & just didn't know what to do. I wrote our case worker to see if it was appropriate to texted Esther to see if she was still thinking of placement. We need to know. I need to stop daydreaming of when he returns & start the official grieving process. The caseworker wrote Esther's mom to confirm that she is going to parent & not place. Haven't heard from her mother either. Now this is where the whole, I never thought I would want something so bad until this. I never knew the feelings that I could have for one little boy that was only in our life for a very small fraction of our life. I ache. My heart literally is in pain. I fear so much right now. I think of him starting to smile & missing it or his first little cold (I know I am strange). Or even teething or sitting, grunting, eating solids or just staring into my face & knowing how much he is loved. I wonder who will enter his life, especially when Esther starts dating. I hope that if she does date that she will not get so involved with a man that she forgets Aiden. I think of all the cases where a baby has been killed or abused because of a boyfriend or step dad. I fear the worst. I want Esther to think she is specially & she deserves the very best. I hold onto my friend Mandy's story. She got pregnant at a young age & she married another man & they are so happy & her husband is AMAZING to all their children. I hope that Aiden gets into the scouting program. Yesterday in church they were talking about Cub Scout Camp & I was a little sad because what Brad will miss with him. I pray everyday that Esther can do it, that she can place Aiden in our arms. I plead with Heavenly Father (I have to have calluses on my knees by now) to help Esther to do it & to be there for her & comfort her. I think it would be so great for him to having a sibling even though they will be six month apart & hard on us, but so exciting. It truly would be the greatest gift & dream that would come true. Now we will continue to pray & if I start walking on my knees because I can't straighten them, you will know why. Aiden I promise you if you don't come back, I pray you will always know that no matter where you are in life, we are praying for you & will love you always. <br />Also, if either adoption doesn't occur, Brad & I are going to Hawaii in March/April for 2 weeks. At least we will have something to look forward to.AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-86992817460575486932010-06-23T18:50:00.000-07:002010-06-23T19:51:04.956-07:00I Hate TitlesI swear I hate thinking of titles for my post. I was never a great writer in my English classes. In fact, I will confess, I plagiarized quit a bit. Then I learned the art of cheating my way through English. Change every third word w/the help of a thesaurus & do a footnote or whatever it is called. SHHHH!!! Don't tell my teachers. Crazy, that I have a college degree & I even majored in history, which of course is all papers & essay test. Good thing I changed to nursing. Well there are my confesses for the day.<br />On to bigger better things. Well OK, not so much better, but things. In Sunday school this coming Sunday the lesson is on Psalms. The entire book of Psalms. Luckily for me they give you different parts to study. One of the parts is putting our trust in God. Can I tell you how hard that is. I am a control freak. Just ask my husband or my co-workers. It is hard for me to put it all to him & have the faith that it will all work out. Of course I am talking about adoption. This is one part of my life that I am trying to put into God's hands & pray for a great out come. Here is the latest & greatest. Esther wrote us an email on Friday night explaining her dilemma with this decision. She says that she would love to place, but it is so difficult to do it. She states that it feels like a death of a loved one. She would love to wake up with the feeling that she can hand him over. She asks for us to pray that she can have the strength to do it. It was a great letter, very nice. Then we texted on Saturday for a little bit & talked about strength & everything. Then on Monday I called her to invite her to my niece's Reyna's soccer game. Because it was the best day & so sunny. She texted back & said no, bc she was celebrating father's day & then she said that she was heading to Hawaii to visit w/her sister while her sister's kids where on a road trip w/Esther's mom. She said that she wanted alone time w/Aiden & her sister. Her sister placed her first son up for adoption about 13-14 yrs ago. That is a story of it's own. After I read that. I lost it. I totally started crying & I had to leave work. I couldn't be there anymore. So I went home. I told Brad & we laid out in the sun for a bit & then got milk shakes from cold stone. Which seems to be our stiff drink through stressful times. It was a blow. Maybe that was her politely saying I have made up my mind to keep him & it is over. I don't know. I get conflicting information. An email saying she wants to place, but it is so hard & now she is going to Hawaii. It broke our hearts. I know one day Brad & I will get through this & we will look back & hopefully understand the reasons behind it. I am trying to stay positive, but it is so hard to not think the worse. I still daydream that Esther will call or text saying, are you guys ready to be parents. I wake up every morning thinking of him & I go to bed thinking of him. I feel my heart has been ripped from my chest & thrown into the garbage disposal. I hate this aching inside. Today at work a x-ray tech brought her baby son that was born on the same day as Aiden in for a luncheon. It was hard to be in the same room. He was such a sweet little baby. It made me miss Aiden so much more. I think about what he is doing every moment of the day. I am sure he is sleeping, eating & poohing a lot. When she said she was going to Hawaii, I thought about an outfit I bought that says beach bum. It is the cutest outfit. Brad took down the crib yesterday. It needed to be done. It was hard to not go in & stand by the crib & imaging him sleeping all bundled up. The worst is the dogs go in every time & look into the crib looking for him. It was a great 24 hrs we had with him & we will cherish it everyday. I still wish we could have more.<br />Now that we have been through this adoption & I know I can't go into the past, which I would love, but things I would have done differently. I wish I could tell Esther, that it will be harder then you think & the first 72 hrs after placement, will be the hardest 72 hrs EVER. I wish her parents told her no, on getting Aiden back. I wish they would have told her, it is time to start grieving & there are people there you can talk with. I wish she got counseling prior to this & talked with other birthmothers. In fact, I would hope that she would think, I will place & then go to Hawaii & be with my sister that can comfort me in this difficult time. But I can't go into the past, let alone change someones mind, but we can only look forward to the future. Brad & I joke that the next adoption, we don't want to know if we have been chosen, we just want to get a phone call saying here is your baby w/no strings attached & then we can live happily ever after. HAHAHAHA!!! What a fantasy I live in. In the end, it was a great adoption process & we will do it again. We are thankful that we meet Esther & her family. I hope that no body thinks that they are bad people, they are wonderful. They are a lot of fun & it was great knowing them. I don't know how long it will take me to get over it or to finally realize that she may never place Aiden into our arms. But I can always hope & pray. We will continue to pray for Esther & that she can find that strength, even if it is a month down the road. We also pray that she will recognize when she has (if not already) the strength, that she will have faith that she can do it. In God all things are possible:)AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-88321159093449973842010-06-17T19:16:00.000-07:002010-06-17T19:19:27.093-07:00Good Things to ComeAn amazing friend of mine, who might I add, has endured a lot more then me. Sent me this great video. This I feel helps on all levels. I thank you & all those that are praying for us as well as Esther. If any of you are having a bad day or are just not doing well, continue the fight!!! It will be alright. I know the Savior lives & I know that he is there for everybody. No matter your circumstances he loves you & he died for you to return to live with him. I am thankful for the Book of Mormon & the Bible & learning from their experiences. I am especially thankful for a living prophet on the earth today that leads & guides us through these difficult times. I am very thankful for this adoption. We have been blessed to know Esther & her family. We pray for them all, that they will know what to do in this situation. Esther & Aiden will always be in our prayers. We will continue to pray that Esther will do what is right & that she will do it with Heavenly Father's help. I hope she realizes that she isn't alone & that He loves her so much. We are all loved. I hope you enjoy this video. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/mormonmessages?v=8nczw6xHJ0I">Good Things to Come</a>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-8804736362096578982010-06-15T12:46:00.000-07:002010-06-16T18:17:22.382-07:00Free AgencyIs a gift from God to chose for ourselves what we want to do. There are blessings when we choose the right & then there are consequences when we don't. It is a great gift & sometimes I just want to take away certain peoples free agency. Well. Where do I begin. Last night we hadn't heard from the birthmother Esther, so I decided to text her mother. Asked how things were going & wanted to give Esther & Aiden there space. I ended with is Esther ready for tomorrow morning. Then about an hour or so later we heard from our social worker. She says that Esther can't picture her life with out Aiden. Esther did talk with the social worker & I don't know exactly what was said. She was given people to talk to that have placed their children up for adoption. But it is still Esther's choice. So now we have to go through life that this adoption is over, unless Esther changes her mind. Which we are still hoping for, but again she is the one that needs to make that decision. Believe me you, Brad & I are livid. I would love to smack her & tell her to snap out of it. The thing is, Esther is not a bad person. She is very nice & a great person. She isn't scary or weird. She just had a baby & I am sure the hormones are going crazy. She didn't prepare for this, AT ALL!!! I knew this was going to happen. I told Brad over & over again, that Esther has no idea what she is getting herself into. She reassured us throughout everything that she was going to place. She said she is stubborn & when she makes her mind up, she follows through. She didn't see this coming.<br />It will take time for Brad & I to get over this. In fact we will talk about this for a long time. They talk about the birthmother having to grieve loosing a child through adoption, but no one thinks that the adoptive parents have to grieve over returning the child. We had a great night with him & we wanted more. Brad was more attached then me. He was so excited. He can't wait to be a dad. He will be the best one out there. It broke my heart to tell him. We will get through this. We feel bad for the next birthmother who chooses us. Because we have now been jaded twice & the next one we'll believe it when it happens. In fact we will announce we adopted when the kid graduates high school. The sad thing is we will probably never hear from the birthmother. I really hope she changes her mind. I hope & pray that she truly thinks about Aiden's needs before her own. Also, if she decides to keep him. I want the name back. I know that is horrible to say. But that is how I feel.<br />We pray for Esther & that she will get through this. I know the Savior loves her & is with her. I can't image what she is going through or what her family is going through as well. But we will get through this & will adopt again. Again, we won't lie, we do want Aiden. We also pray for Aiden and that he is doing well & growing & developing.<br />We thank everyone who has been there for us & have prayed for both Brad & I, & especially for Esther. This is not the end.AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-38066738673049783552010-06-13T21:15:00.000-07:002010-06-13T22:04:42.101-07:00Ups & Downs of Adoption<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8YVWA1AchwgcTRsNd-fWByXMVJQcNnFFzr4yYMDIoaOnzFjbRdfWC5NXa2F-lvLp3JEDuIvW2aNPNwQ_sD0r4bCSs447uV6hdYbcSW9xOiDnf_KrHrExxVJdZv0pYnUC47Jt3pS19bmk/s1600/Aiden+%26+Brad.JPG"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 150px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5482490585252380722" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8YVWA1AchwgcTRsNd-fWByXMVJQcNnFFzr4yYMDIoaOnzFjbRdfWC5NXa2F-lvLp3JEDuIvW2aNPNwQ_sD0r4bCSs447uV6hdYbcSW9xOiDnf_KrHrExxVJdZv0pYnUC47Jt3pS19bmk/s200/Aiden+%26+Brad.JPG" /></a> Before I go into too much detail for the adoption. I first want to say, I have a great set of friends. I couldn't have asked for a better set. I have been truly blessed with the best of the besties. I know only the Lord knows what will come about & he will be the one I lean on the most. I am thankful for him & for the friends that he has sent into my life to carry me through it all. That sounds like bad things are coming. I am trying not to sound like everything is horrible. But adoption has its ups & downs. Right now we are just in between. Let start with the 7th of June. The birthmother goes into get her cervix ripened. Which by the way, I think is the funniest sound thing in the world. It just makes me think she is a banana or a tomato or something. But she went in. They said that if she hit 4 cms then they will admit her. Well after putting 1/4 of tablet in her cervix & having her walk & walk, she only dilated to a nearly 3. So she was sent home & was instructed to return the next day and do it again. Well at about 2-3 in the morning she was having increased pain & her & her mom went to the hospital. I don't think she was a complete 4, but she was in a lot of pain & they admitted her. We got wind about 9 am, I think. It literally feels like years have gone by. But we were called again about 10 or 11 & was told she went from a 5 to a 7 & she was getting an epidural & to come to the hospital. We got there right after it was done & she was instructed to get some sleep. Her mother, Brad & I went to into the waiting room and hung out & talked. Finally she went back & checked on her daughter. In the mean time, I decided to take a picture of Brad & I waiting. I bring the camera out & lo & behold it doesn't work. We thought it was the batteries. Brad went & got the last of them at ANMC. Still the camera didn't work. Brad then went to Providence Hospital down the street & bought a disposable camera. Saved!!! Her mother came out with an update that the birthmother was at 9 cms. We waited some more. We were so bored. I wish we thought of bringing cards or something. They had nothing in the waiting room. Finally the time came & her mother came out & said that the birthmother had to be put onto all 4 to try to deliver & she didn't want me in there. Totally understood. I wouldn't want myself in there, if I was in her position. So I start pacing. Then about 20 minutes or so later. She came out & said that he was born. Brad & I go racing in there. There we saw the cutest & loudest baby ever. He had a great set of lungs. Brad & I were in just aw. I just started to cry & was excited for this little boy to come into our lives. The worst of it, was the poor birthmother was crying & I felt torn, because I didn't know exactly what she was crying about. They were having to message her fundus, because she was bleeding & she was crying out in pain. She was also yelling to get a picture of him, so she can see him. We finally were able to figure the phone out & get a good picture of him. Then the baby was brought to her & she yelled to see if we had held him yet. We said no, & she requested we hold him. So Brad was able to hold him first. It was great. What a sweet little face he had, with big cheeks. After him, then I held him. He was wide awake & just looking at everything. It was wonderful. Well they finished cleaning the birthmother up & we were able to talk to her. Oh, so the stats on the little, well not so little baby boy: 6-8-10<br /><div><div><div>Aiden is 9 lbs & 10 oz, yes!!! and 20 1/2 inches long. He was a big baby. We couldn't believe it. Well that is what they get when they have her go over 2 weeks. Mamma Mia. But he came out wanting food as well. They had to do blood sugars because he was so big & that came back great & so he was presented his first bottle. At first he just kind of played with it & then he figured it out & he just sucked away. He ate & burped really well. In fact he even farted & I swear he smiled afterwards. But he did really well. After that they cleaned him up & him & the birthmother went to mother/baby. We stayed for a little longer & had to go home to tend to the puppies. That I night, I slept. I was exhausted. The next day, I puts around the house getting things done & just waiting to be able to go see little Aiden. We were able to go that night about 7 pm. While we were there the missionaries for LDS Family Services came by to discuss placement. It wasn't going to happen in the hospital, but at Baxter Chapel. Also we weren't going to sign anything bc she didn't have a photo id. So the next day were to meet the family at ANMC so they can use our car seat to take him to Baxter Chapel. The next we went to the hospital about 4ish & the birthmother was washing Aiden & getting him all cleaned up. When she came around the corner, she was crying & when she walked past me I felt so sorry for her. That I was going to be the one taking her baby from her. I truly felt that I was an enemy there. They never once made me feel that way, but we were going to be the ones raising him & we would be called mom & dad. It was just a certain feeling that is hard to explain. We finally got to Baxter Chapel for placement. The birthmother seemed very stoic to me & she cried. It seemed very hard for her. Like harder then she expected. She had a little bit of alone time & then she requested that she put him in the car seat & then put him in our car. Well she was able to put him in the car seat, but we ended up putting him in the car. We that was that & off we went to go home & start our new adventure. It was nuts knowing we had a little baby. We got home & introduced him to the Lucy & Abigail & they did so great. We held him for a little bit & then a good friend Jayci came over w/a very yummy meal & she held him for a little bit. When she left we put him in his swing & we had dinner. It was weird. Then we feed him & put him to bed. Then the fun began. I didn't sleep well because I was afraid I wouldn't hear him or I don't know. But I heard him just fine. He woke up about midnight wanting to eat. He also wet through his diaper. I had NB diapers & he really needed size ones. I planned on getting them the next day. We changed him & feed him. Oh he peed on Brad & himself. LOL:) He went back to sleep & I of course didn't sleep well. Next about 2:30-3:00 am he woke for more food & then he kind of went to sleep, but not really. He was using a pacifier & it would come out & I went in there to put it in. That went on for about 2-3 hours. Then he was awake & I feed & changed him & he then went in his swing so I could get a little bit more sleep. HAHAHAHA!!! Sleep that is a joke. Finally I got up & got ready for the day. Brad helped till about 3 am & he need to sleep bc he was going to work the next day. The next day I had a meeting to go to & then off to wal-mart to purchase size one diapers & other little stuff. This is were all the fun begins. We get there & my phone rings & it is our social worker in Seattle calling to tell us that the birthmother wanted him back because she had a horrible night & morning. She only wanted him till Tuesday. They wanted to bring him by at 6:30 pm that night, that was Friday. I go home & I call Brad & we both just started crying on the phone. Oh & we received his scores back from the Boise Fire Department. I asked if I could open them & he said no. I told him I couldn't handle two bad things in one day. Later that night two of my friends Jessy & Terra came over & gave us some yummy food, yet again. I told you I have some pretty amazing/great friends. We talked for a little bit & then Brad came home. Brad opened his test score while we sat on the stairs & he didn't pass. He needed a 89% & higher on the test & he got a 79%. We cried some more. I told him I hope the bad things don't happen in threes. We decided to give Aiden a bath & he did not like that one bit. We cleaned him up & put some fresh clothes on him & fell right to sleep on Brad's chest. It was so darling. Then we were off. To tell you the truth, I didn't know what to expect. We didn't know if they wanted to see us or what. We got there the same time as them. They came up to us & we talked. They told us that we would get him back on Tuesday morning. The birthmother just needed sometime with him alone & to say good-bye. She didn't get that in the hospital. Totally understood. They put him in the car seat they got him & they were off. I felt confident it would be that way. It was a great meeting. Her family is really nice & I like the birthmother. She is very nice & funny. I understand this is what she needs to go through. Adoption is a grieving process for the birthmother. After that we went to the movies w/my sister-in-law & my nieces. We saw Letters to Juliet. So cute. Then we went home & I slept! The next day her mother called & left a message on our phone telling us not to get discourage that we will get him back on Tuesday. It was great to hear from her. Now we wait some more. My whole life has been a waiting game. Come Tuesday morning I hope she can do it. I try not to doubt that it won't happen. It is hard. I think about him every second of the day, hoping & praying he is doing well. I ache for him. I do know he is in good hands. The birthmother & her mother are great people. They have a great family. I am happy that we know them. This just has been a challenge & hope it will end on Tuesday. </div><div>I am thankful for Brad & having great patience for this. He is amazing. He is the best. He is so good with him & you can see the pride in his eyes when he hold him. I know the birthmother will make the best choice for Aiden. I couldn't image what she is going through. Just think if you were to give one of your children away right after birth. I am sure it will be one of the most difficult things she will go through. She is a hero. She gave him life & giving him so much more. I wish you could all meet her. She is so fun. I hope the next post will be he is home again. I will be impressed if anybody reads this entire post. It is a bit long. So I will end it now. Thank you to all the prayers & support. You are all amazing & I love you & thank you.</div></div></div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-19181395872076355742010-05-31T22:11:00.001-07:002010-05-31T22:20:06.712-07:00Still Waiting:)<div><div>As the birthmother is about to hit her 41st week of this seemingly long pregnancy to her not me. Because for me it is a 3-4 wks pregnancy. Bam!!! Here is a baby. This is what I actually prayed for. I really didn't want a long dragged out 9 month adoption of will she or won't she. I like this, ok here you go in a month. But we are still waiting. The hospital she goes to ANMC won't induce until 42 weeks. Tomorrow she has an appointment if I remember her correctly & she hopes, as well I as hope she has progressed more. I told her to ask them to strip her membranes. I did warn her & told her it is painful, but she said she would & if they give her a weird look of, how do you know this. She says she will tell them her baby mama told me. I laughed. I having a feeling she will be induced. So one more week of waiting & preparing. Well tring to prepare as best as possible. One thing I am doing is making a sheep mobile. My friend Jayci told me about them & we planned a craft night & attempted to make them. Mine are special sheep. I am just happy that Aiden won't have great vision & can't see all my mistakes. But here are the pictures for now. I still need to add the ears, per Brad, bc he said it will look better & hang them on the mobile part. I am including the picture that it is suppose to look like as well. Can't wait to hang it above the crib. Oh, by the way, you can order one on Esty for like $80 or make them yourself for like oh, about $5.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuVwwHfDMLQsal7gRA2_DZJkYDWcRJE4eQIwGVXe3FaB4oDTnDXfcq_0wJRT3kha-k2S-_qqjwEw5zExZmZ_ukgAoPd6WDwQVPm72SGYGhoYjAo4jkPW9W_G5FFHRYDk-u_93eWqjX0Os/s1600/Sheep+Mobile+Org..jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 188px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5477670517100193730" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuVwwHfDMLQsal7gRA2_DZJkYDWcRJE4eQIwGVXe3FaB4oDTnDXfcq_0wJRT3kha-k2S-_qqjwEw5zExZmZ_ukgAoPd6WDwQVPm72SGYGhoYjAo4jkPW9W_G5FFHRYDk-u_93eWqjX0Os/s200/Sheep+Mobile+Org..jpg" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQeXYD1ur23VO_h0G62kRYl3qCMR1H85e5JGkVQt7utJf61z006zA1fUzO8YwiwuC80GulTP5BDrdh3SBW0npgSZl59fYXFOncJm41P9cT3jAScinjuJUYZVz_B_28N0JFFEbyJauH11M/s1600/Adoption+Photos+002.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 150px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5477670512630046130" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQeXYD1ur23VO_h0G62kRYl3qCMR1H85e5JGkVQt7utJf61z006zA1fUzO8YwiwuC80GulTP5BDrdh3SBW0npgSZl59fYXFOncJm41P9cT3jAScinjuJUYZVz_B_28N0JFFEbyJauH11M/s200/Adoption+Photos+002.jpg" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjq9Fxn-z_sCjih1cdTBJlVFabDB1LJ7dd2bb6jSXS-nnoMNR8lRs6rsB1W8FhSsX8xnAhjhPMEJBktXvV_yY36Cwqfe8SsI1KDE2syzeN3gSEsG2dF1UnjJZiW0GTHySSRuZDqOv0ggjw/s1600/Adoption+Photos+001.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 150px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5477670503394943602" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjq9Fxn-z_sCjih1cdTBJlVFabDB1LJ7dd2bb6jSXS-nnoMNR8lRs6rsB1W8FhSsX8xnAhjhPMEJBktXvV_yY36Cwqfe8SsI1KDE2syzeN3gSEsG2dF1UnjJZiW0GTHySSRuZDqOv0ggjw/s200/Adoption+Photos+001.jpg" /></a></div><div></div><div></div></div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-17947096104738181612010-05-24T23:45:00.000-07:002010-05-25T00:15:05.305-07:00I must be nesting!!!<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">I have to be. I am cleaning like a mad women. I shampooed that living room carpets & the babies room. I even vacuumed the stair. Which I HATE doing. I have washed all the baby stuff I do have, which isn't much & that includes bottles. We haven't bought too much, because of the fear that she will change her mind. I really don't want to look at babies stuff to just have a constant reminder that another adoption fell through. So for now, we have what we need to get by for about 3 days. The baby furniture is all painted. It was hand me downs & I wasn't to fond of the color of wood, so why not paint. It was cheaper then buying a whole new set. By the way, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Berh</span> primer & painter in one, is the best. TOTALLY doesn't smell like any other paint. If fact, it hardly smells at all. The mattress is cleaned & I put the sheet on it & was like, yippee:) The theme is, 'Oh, the Place You'll Go'. It is from Dr. Seuss & I love it. I want to instill in this little boy that the world is his & he can do so much. The bedding, if it happens, is Mosaic Transportation. It is cars, trains & airplanes made out of Mosaic tiles. It is so cute. We are waiting patiently. She is due this week.</span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Oh, did I ever tell you that the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">birthmother</span> is amazing. She is the nicest person in the world, with quit a spunky/sassy sense of humor. We have been <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">texting</span> & getting to know her. It has been fun & entertaining at the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">textes</span> that have taken place. One of them has been on the name. From the last post, we thought we settled on <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">Crayton</span> James Thomas. However every time I would write it, it would remind me of crayola crayons. Crazy, I know. Well the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">birthmother</span> would always ask if we had thought about other names. I told her my concern about the whole crayola things & she wrote back, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">HAHAHAHA</span> I call him the crayola baby. Well that was that & I got the answer about the name. Now back to the drawing board. I mentioned Eli & Peyton, I know they are the Manning Brothers, but I do like the names. Brad said NO! real quick. Then I mentioned the name <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">Aiden</span>. She wrote back & said she liked it. She said how about Merritt for a middle name. So I <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">texted</span> back <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">Aiden</span> Merritt Thomas. She replied she loved it. You are wondering where Brad was in all this. Sitting next to me & nodding his head. He says it is just a name. Whatever. But she said to not be surprised if she puts it on his birth card. So for now it is <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" class="blsp-spelling-error">Aiden</span> Merritt Thomas, but he could come out looking like a George. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_11" class="blsp-spelling-error">LOL</span>:):):)</span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Other big things going on in our life. Boise Fire Department. Brad is coming home tonight from Idaho. He went down thinking the weather would be nice. Boy were we both wrong. It snowed. And Alaska had amazing weather. Why are we thinking of going to Idaho. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_12" class="blsp-spelling-error">Ok</span>. The test was on Saturday & he says it was very similar to the test that he took for Anchorage a few years back, just a different order of the questions. Also about 400 people applied, compared to Anchorage 900 applications. We will know by June 15<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_13" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> if he passed the test or not. He says he feels good about it, but when I say that, I fail. Besides taking the test, he was able to see if parents & brother. The best was, his parent drove him to take the test. So cute & amazing. Thank you Larry & Laurie for being such a great help & support. I can't wait to see him. </span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">When it rains it pours in our home. I am very thankful for this time in my life. I know I need to have continued faith that everything will work out. I will not lie, I do hold back on my excitement, but to tell you the truth, I am so EXCITED!!! I can't wait to be a mom. Brad is going to be a great dad & Lucy & Abigail will be great big/little sisters. Our house is getting in orders for a wonderful chaos to come in. Oh & <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_14" class="blsp-spelling-error">Aiden</span> means little fire. The <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_15" class="blsp-spelling-error">birthmom</span> says hopefully not his temper. YIKES! But I replied, Brad is a firefighter & he can be Brad's little fire. I know, I know I am pathetic. Till the next post. And hopefully the announcement of our new addition to the family. Thank you for all your prayers, love & support. A <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_16" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">special</span> thanks to the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_17" class="blsp-spelling-error">birthmother</span> & her courage to do this at such a young age. She is in our prayers & will always be. We can't thank her enough for this. She will always be apart of our family because of him & I so can't wait to see what kind of person she ends up. She will do great things. </span>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-29637035781486805462010-05-07T23:37:00.000-07:002010-05-08T00:14:31.820-07:00What do I say...I have been think of a title for this blog & couldn't think of one. I thought about, here we are again, but I said <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">na</span>. I still don't know where to begin. I guess I will start with yesterday morning. It was a Thursday, my usual flex day. I don't have to be to work until 1230 & I was up checking my email. Usually I get junk, stuff about my lovely bills or <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">lydia's</span> scrubs. Stuff I love to delete. Well that morning was different. Brad & I received an email from <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">LDS</span> Family Service stating that a young girl has a baby boy that is due the end of May & she liked our profile. That was the gist of it. Brad & I had to both read it over & over again to make sure it was actually real. When we figured it was real, we wrote them back telling them that we are thankful & excited & all that fun stuff. There was more, but I am not going to go into that much detail. Well we forward it to our social worker in WA & with in 30-45 minutes she wrote back. She stated that the birth mother's mother called to get the ball rolling. I was shocked at the quick response. So I thought it would be a couple of days before anything big would happen. Boy was I wrong. Because about 4 pm the missionaries working for <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">LDS</span> Family Services contacted us & asked if we wanted to meet her either Friday or Saturday after 4 pm. I was like we would LOVE to. So the time was set to meet at 4:45 pm. Can I tell you that it was the longest day EVER. I thought time was going backwards. It was nuts. Well the time finally came & we meet with her. She was so cute. The prettiest thing ever. She in fact look exactly like my friend <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">Christy</span> from nursing school. It was crazy. It was a great meeting. We totally cried, laughed & everything in between. I can not tell the emotions that I felt. It was crazy. She was so neat. I loved her mom. They both were very personable & very very nice. So much was discussed. She is due the end of May & they think she will deliver the first week of June. Crazy quick. The way she talked, it sound like we are it. But from our last experience we felt the same way & we all know how that ended. But we talked about names & that Brad & I had different names picked out & we told her & she told us names that she liked. She really liked boy names that ended in -in or -on. One of the names that we talked about was <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">Crayton</span>. She likes that name. We love <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">Crayton</span> James Thomas. I actually love that name. Paging Dr. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">Crayton</span> Thomas. But anyway. It sounds so sure. But as we were closing, I told her it is her decision & that I hope that she has a great experience. She had planned from the beginning to put the baby up for adoption & the first couple she chose fell through. So she was basically scrambling to find another couple. That is were we came in. She said that she had started buying clothes <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">bc</span> she knew it was getting close & they didn't have an adoptive couple. But she told us she would give us the babies clothes, stating that the baby would be ours. It is so VERY hard not to be so extremely excited. I just want to dance in the streets w/excitement. I want to announce it to the world that Brad & I are going to be parents. But I have to tell you the truth. I hold back a little. I think it is a protection thing, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">bc</span> things can happen. A family member may step up & want to adopt or she may take one look into that precious little boys face & fall head over heals for him. When the baby is finally placed in our arms, then we will begin to scream at the top of our lungs. YIPPEE!!!!!!!!! Here we are again. Waiting. Which is the theme of our lives. But this is a good wait & a little stressful, but good. <br />We will continue to pray for her & hope that everything will go well. We pray that the transition will go well & that she will continue to know this is the right decision. We are very thankful for her & she is so amazing. In the beginning she said she was afraid that we wouldn't like here & here is me, I hope she likes us. Because Brad & I looked to frumpy when we got there. I had every intention to look normal, but I got up late & was unable to wash my hair to look like a human & Brad had to go straight from work to there. I swear we look normal & I hope that when we meet again it will be different. Her father wants to meet us. Hopefully that will happen soon. <br />We are very thankful for this time. I couldn't be any happier or grateful. This young lady will give us the best gift ever. We are thankful for her & will always pray for her. I wish you could all meet her. So for now, we wait & see. I will post more when I hear more:)AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-19689743699515415952010-04-03T00:28:00.001-07:002010-04-03T01:00:16.688-07:00General ConferenceI am so excited for general conference. It only happens twice a year & the best 2 weekends of the year. Well besides the birth of Christ & his Atonement. A wonderful time to hear from out Prophet & the 12 apostles & the messages they have for us. I get excited for the announcements of new temples & just updates the church is doing in the world. So exciting. In church last week our lesson in Relief Society was on preparing for General Conference. I took that lesson to heart this week & pondered & prayed about what I want to get out of it. They encourage us to come with a problem or a question and we can know that it will be answered. I thought long & hard about my problem or question. I can't really go with the question: When will I get to adopt? I don't picture Pres. Monson saying, Sarah P. Thomas on 7/25/10 you will you get your baby. But I thought more of a problem I have. That problem is my Grinch heart. I have a very small, shriveled up heart that my nursing career has sucked dry. I know those are harsh words. But statics say that nurses on average burnout at 3 years. Well I have been a nurse for over 4 years & I can honestly say that is true. People take & take & take, that I just don't have anything more to give. I am talking about my patients, NOT family members or friends. But I am going in wanting to overcome this. I know they say, when you serve them, you will grow to love them. Not the case in nursing. I need my heart to be softened and I need to love serving my patients. I think where the big problem lies, is I don't know if they are sincerely telling me the truth or lying to me to get drugs. It is so hard to discern between my true needy patients & my needy patients. So I treat them all the same. Which I know I shouldn't. I try to think of, what would Jesus do? But I fail with in seconds. I really need to know what to do to love & serve them. So that is my General Conference plan & any other messages my Heavenly Father wants me to hear. I am excited it is over Easter weekend & the talks will most likely be about the sacrifice, resurrection & atonement of Jesus Christ. Which I am so thankful for. It saddens me at time to think the He suffered for my sins, I hope not too many drops of blood. Maybe a paper cut size. But still those are very annoying. But I am thankful for Him & will always appreciate what he did for me & the best example of service. My favorite story from the New Testaments is when Jesus was walking through the streets & this women just wanted to touch the hem of his outfit & she knew if she did that she would be healed. Matthew 9:20-22. The best part is He turned about & when he saw her he said, Daughter, be of good comfort: they faith hath made thee whole. And the woman was made whole from that hour. It is a totally of 3 verse in the bible & they are the strongest for me. I can't tell you how many times, I have wished to just touch a tiny, little bit of his garment. I am excited for this weekend. It will be great and on Monday it is a new day & I can always start over. The hard part will be to stick with it & not just return to my same old shriveled up self. One can hope.AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-68606715502913270952010-03-22T20:50:00.000-07:002010-03-22T21:25:16.290-07:00Boise, MD Apt & IVFYes, I said IVF. Thought I wouldn't be saying that for a very long time. But I did. Crazy. Last time I checked hell hasn't frozen over just yet. Today I had my annual apt. Always a favorite in a girls life. One day of the year that you dread but know it is something that you have to do. For me it is a day that reminds me that my organs are very special & need tending. I went in fully expecting to schedule surgery. Lets recap. Two plus years ago I had surgery to figure out why no babies & I was officially diagnosed with endometriosis. Dr. Counts said that I needed to go on 6 months of Lupron injections & then do another more intense surgery to clean out all my yucky stuff. Well my fertility nurse put a stop to that & said no. Lupron can kill a portion of my eggs & decrease getting pregnant through IVF. So after about a year Brad & I decided to try IVF. Well as you know that didn't work & I vowed NEVER to do it again. Lets put it this way, it was the MOST uncomfortable thing I have ever done & hell would be frozen before I would attempt that again. So needless to say Brad & I went to my apt & Dr. Counts talked with us about 2 options. Mostly money related. Do we wants to put money into trying IVF again or do a robotic procedure to clean up my goodies. What a decision. She says NOT to go to previous MD again but to travel to Seattle & have it done down there. Where they will completely knock me out & I wouldn't have to feel the joys of a needle going in & out, in & out, in & out 5x in my ovary with little sedation. Before trying the robotic procedure. So Brad & I left with a lot on our minds. Well we get home & check our mail & yippee.... We got the first, we hope of many, letters from Boise FD. It was the letter telling Brad to fill out the exam acceptance & paying $20 & mailing it back to them. Brad was right on it with filling it out & getting the $20 money order & getting it out in the mail for tomorrow pick-up. Brad & I talked, well actually I talked & Brad listened, about waiting until after the Boise FD application/exam/interview process is over before thinking about IVF. We looked to see if they have a IVF clinic in Boise & they do. We will continue w/adoption & if we go to Boise then we will do the IVF again. But for now we will focus on Boise & pray that my goodies don't get so bad that I will have to have surgery again. Oh, Brad's test will be between May 8th and 22nd. I hoping for a Monday, so he doesn't have to miss work. But they said they won't send the testing letter until the 3rd week of April. Maybe with Brad they will let him know earlier because he needs to travel so far. Again in our life, we wait some more. Nothing new.<br />Oh, I have to say this. We are reading from the Old Testament in Sunday school & we have just got done w/Genesis. What I have learned was that a few of the great Prophet's wives couldn't conceive. Well when they finally did, they gave birth to great leaders. Soooooo. Maybe I will give birth to the next prophet. HAHAHAHAHA. LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It has been nice to learn from there experiences & how they leaned upon the Lord for support. But I to would laugh like Sarah, if I was told that I would give birth at 99 yrs old.AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-49089522272314162012010-03-17T22:48:00.000-07:002010-03-17T23:24:30.799-07:00So which one should we pray more about?So I know I haven't written in a while, but I feel that I am always on a soapbox & just complain about my patients. Which by the way have behaved themselves very nicely this week. Maybe they are getting the memo. Well I know one who didn't & she about pushed me over the edge. But I will not go into that, I will just let it go. Things in the nursing field are great & I love the people I work with. They are wonderful people that keep me laughing & wanting to get up every morning at 5.30 am to just laugh & have a great time. In a few weeks is a orthopedic conference in <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Girdwood</span> & a bunch of us girls are leaving the husband/boyfriends at home & sharing room. It will be fun & I doubt I will get any sleep. If the snow is still good, we are going to go cross country skiing. This will last 2 minutes because, A: I am out of shape & B: Because I will probably fall every 2 seconds. I am getting excited & am looking forward to the conference.<br />Alright to the title of the blog. Prayer. Prayer is a funny thing. I kneel down by my bed about every night & I think about it before I pour out my heart & soul. What is so different about tonight's prayer then last nights. I try not to pray about the same thing. However, I actually do, but attempt to word it different. I wonder if he gets tired of me praying about this or that, or if he is really saying ENOUGH, have patience's I will answer it. It remind me of a child saying repeatedly, please, please, pretty please, please with a cherry on top. I always have to chuckle. But every night I kneel down & do pray for certain things about every night. One of course being adoption, but now it is something else that is big. In fact, so big I am about to put the adoption prayer on hold & focus on this. Alright here it is. I don't know if I wrote about Brad applying to the Boise Fire Department. Well if I didn't here you go. A few months ago, Brad & I were talking about fire fighting jobs & with the economy the way it is & getting to old to apply. Anchorage probably won't hire for like a million years with all the cuts they are making. So on with the story. We were looking at departments in Seattle WA, Portland OR & I even looked at <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">SLC</span>. Crazy I know. But Brad mentioned something about Boise, ID. So why not look & low & behold they were testing this year. Brad decided to fill out there employee interest card & that the closing date for that would be March 15<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span>. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Soooooooooooo</span>, finally after waiting for like forever, it finally closed. Now we just want for the letter on where & when the test is & Brad will be off to take that test. They do a few things different then Anchorage. He doesn't fill out an application until after he passes the test. Then he fills out the application & goes to do an interview. Then if he passes the interview then he goes & takes all the other test & then he is ranked & put on a list. Then Boise will pull from the list when there are positions to fill. At this time we are praying to be put on the list. The list is good for 2 years. I am excited & very nervous about even thinking of moving. But right now we just need to focus on one thing at a time. His written exam. It will be in May sometime. When he passes that, then we will worry about the application & interview. So the big question is, do we pray for 2 big/huge things or do we just focus on one thing at a time. I do want to adopt really bad, but I want Brad to make <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">BFD</span> more. Mostly because it will benefit our family. I can focus on being a stay at home mom, if I have the patience's or not. I think it would open the doors for our family if Brad was able to make it on. Of course my mother-in-law would be thrilled to have Brad closer. Even though he doesn't really talk to his family. No fighting, just Brad doesn't talk. It is his fault completely. He is the quiet one. I feel so bad for Heavenly Father & my prayers. He has to giggle when I phone in. Now the blog will now be geared to Brad's journey to the Boise Fire Department. I really hope & pray it happens. I know our family will be so blessed. I know that there is a plan out there for us. Yes we dictate which way that plan will go through our free agency, but I know if we live the gospel worthily & do what we need to do & pay our tithing that our choices will take us to the plan the He wants for us. It is very hard to think about moving, especially moving away from my amazing nieces, who of course I adore. But I know it is something that needs to be done for the sake of our family. Now we just pray & do our best & leave the rest to Him.AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-44091545393236601022010-02-21T16:29:00.000-08:002010-02-21T17:04:21.504-08:00So the other day...Brad & I were watching Julie/Julia. A movie about a person writing a blog while cooking Julia <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Childs</span> recipes & her <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">experiences</span>. At the same time you get a look into Julia <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Childs</span>' life. There was one part in the movie that made me stop & cry a few little tears. In the movie she <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">receives</span> a letter from her sister that was recently married that told her that she was pregnant. When she read that she turned and cried into her husbands shoulder. For that brief moment in the movie I felt her pain. I to have cried many times in my husband shoulder with news of people getting pregnant. I don't want to sound like I am not happy when my friends or family announces they are pregnant. I am truly happy for them. I am excited to go to their baby showers or even throw them a baby shower. I do pray & wish to expand our family. I truly daydream about the day when it does happen. I can't wait. <br />Today in church I had to attend another ward for their ward conference. The joys of my calling is attending other wards for their conferences. I get to meet so many women. During Relief Society I get to introduce my self & tell them a little bit about my self. I say I am an RN, married & have no children. I, of course follow that with, "we are hoping to adopt soon." After the meeting a sweet sister came up to me & told me that after 6 yrs of marriage her & her husband adopted a boy & he just returned off his mission. She gave me a little <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">glimpse</span> into pain of what I am going through. She knew what I was going through. I love that she didn't say to me, keep the faith & hold on or there is a baby out there for me. But she just understood. I know I am not a lone with this challenge & I know that Brad & I will one day be parents. When I don't know. Hopefully not when I am 99 yrs old. I am truly thankful that I do have this time with Brad. He is my rock & my love. I couldn't have asked for a better husband. He had been the best through all my testing, shot giving & hormone imbalance. I truly can't wait to see Brad as a dad. He will be the BEST dad in the world. I can't even explain how he is with kids & how patient he is with them. People may say I am biased. But when he gets father of the year, you will then find out truly how amazing he is. I know the Lord has His hand in all things & I love praying at night & pouring my heart & soul out to Him. I can't thank Him enough. He is truly my Heavenly Father. So I will continue to wait & be very excited for all that get pregnant around me. Because I know that my day will come & the WHOLE world will know:):)AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-51803310682752478962010-02-06T15:14:00.000-08:002010-02-06T15:34:10.325-08:00Uncle Brad<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8uYGfWkdbAEAT0D-mZf6wtIcy4GQ4V19v1cmCpFOvPWn2nPP1R4b1yS_T1_0lyKOQgATTiiGiTKApGnCEhslPvkIUaSmYGP1Vs-Ksx5i_i0Z6PsyJ5JUFkomXz-TwJMrTYu2CL4XQpjM/s1600-h/IMG_0947.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 320px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5435277663902063970" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8uYGfWkdbAEAT0D-mZf6wtIcy4GQ4V19v1cmCpFOvPWn2nPP1R4b1yS_T1_0lyKOQgATTiiGiTKApGnCEhslPvkIUaSmYGP1Vs-Ksx5i_i0Z6PsyJ5JUFkomXz-TwJMrTYu2CL4XQpjM/s320/IMG_0947.jpg" /></a><br /><div>I think my neices love Uncle Brad more then me. I am the one who makes them quilts, blankets & other fun things. I take them to fun places & I attempt to teach them the fun in cooking. But when it comes to homework assignments, they will write about Uncle Brad & not me. Go figure. Kennedy had a writing lesson last year & she had to write a letter to a family member. She wrote to Brad. It was cute when we found out. Because Mike & Dee had no idea until parent teacher conference what Kennedy did until the teacher gave them the letter. It was so cute. Then Reyna had to write a story. It was the cutest story. Here is goes:</div><br /><div>Saving My Family!</div><br /><div>By: Reyna</div><br /><div>One day a firefighter came to my house. There was a fire! I couldn't really breathe. It was painful. So the firefighter came in my house and saved my cats and dog. I was so happy. I gave them a huge hug! And I yelled hurray. It was cool that they saved my mom and dad too. I was so so so happy. I just noticed it was my uncle who was the firefighter.</div><br /><div>It was so cute. </div><br /><div>I am thankful for my husband. He is going to be the best dad ever. He is so good with Kennedy & Reyna. He is very patient & a great teacher. When ever I have the girls over after school & they are doing their homework, Brad is so good & amazing with them. I have a feeling he will be the good parent. I can't wait for him to be a dad. He will be the best!!! It makes me sad sometimes knowing that I am the one who can't give him that. But we are hopeful for adoption. </div><br /><div></div>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-54959326794119218512010-02-03T21:22:00.000-08:002010-02-03T22:19:03.605-08:00Why did I become a nurse?So, the other day a friend of mine asked for a favor. He daughter had to interview a nurse & so she emailed me the questions. I forgot that the daughter was in Utah & wasn't able to help her complete the assignment. However some of the questions made me think. There was actually 2 questions. One I will discuss later, but the last question was, why did I become a nurse? Easily, I love working with people. I know when I talk about my job, I talk about how my patients annoy me & some of them should just go away. But to tell you the truth. I LOVE BEING A NURSE!!! It fits my personality & I love it. I love working with people & it is a lot of fun. You meet the most interesting people & the crazy things that they do. In fact, I never <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">thought</span> I could make it as a nurse. But the Lord has a way of leading & guiding you in life. My <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">patriaritcal</span> blessing states that, "you will lift heads up with your kind acts." Something like that. I laugh when I read that. It is a great job. It isn't cut out for everyone. I still day dream about going back into the hospital to be a L&D nurse, but right now I need to be were I am at. I chose this career & I am happy with it.<br /><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Ok</span>. The other question is, what do you like & dislike about nursing. I hate to say it, but I was quick to name my dislikes more then my likes. And I hate to say it & this is why I am so jaded as a nurse & a compassionate person. I hate, I use that word, because that is the only way I can express the irritation of this. I hate when people take advantage of a system that is to help people & they abuse it & make it hard for everyone else. Yes, I am talking about Medicaid. I have one too many patients that are on medicaid that shouldn't be & should get off their lazy butt & get a job or education to better themselves. I think that it is great that there is a program out there for those that need it, not deserve it. I can't tell you enough how many people abuse this system & get away with it. I get so angry when I think about it & the health reform that is out there. Well not so much now. I am sorry, if you can't control medicaid then how can you do a reformed medicine. Let alone take money away from people that are FORCED to be on Medicare & expect them to get medical care. I strongly believe that people who don't have control over the medical, for example those under the age of 18 & over 65 should with out a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">dought</span> get medical coverage. There should be no reason why. They should be the number one priority. I do believe that everyone that is legal in the United States should have the right to having coverage. The clinic I work for is taking less medicare because it isn't paying very much, it should be the other way. I feel medicare patients should have no problem getting into a provider. That is my number one dislike. I <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">apologise</span> to my patients for the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">unsympathetic</span> attitude. I <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">blame</span> the MANY patients that have taken advantage of my nice, no problem attitude. I hate to say it, but when you truly have a problem, I have heard it a thousand times & the sad thing is, I am tire of it. I will continue to serve you, but I am sorry if I don't sound like I care. So my advise to anybody who wants to go into the health field who has a heart. Have a funeral now, because your heart will shrivel up & die. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">Ok</span>, I am not saying that all of nursing is this way. I do have a goal to be a school nurse. I can't wait. I loved when I substituted for the school district. I love working with the kids. They are innocent & haven't been jaded by the world just yet. Now I may <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">write</span> about how I don't like the parents, but that is a whole different story:):)AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-84416333659243013012010-01-03T21:26:00.000-08:002010-01-03T21:57:19.056-08:00Good-Bye 2009, HELLLLLOOOOO 2010I can not believe that 2009 is over. It feels like yesterday it was 2009 & I was thinking where 2008 went. My oh my, times goes by fast. People say it goes by faster when you have children. Crazy. A lot has happened in 2009 & can't believe it is over. It all started out with a huge question of doing IVF or continuing w/adoption. We did IVF & failed. In fact in church today I thought about it & if it worked I would be due this month in a couple of days. So IVF didn't work & we continued to do adoption. We did have a birth mother chose us, but that fell through. Now we wait & wait some more. They say it can take 1-2 yrs. Hopefully not that long but you never know. We went on a cruise & enjoyed every minute of it. We have been blessed. Brad was able to get transferred to the Eagle River FedEx office & it has been a learning experience for him. He now has to work customer service. Good thing he is a gentle & patient person. I continue to work at AFOC. That was our 2009. <br />2010 year hopefully will be another blessed year. One major thing that will be happening is: Boise Fire Department is hiring. Yes IDAHO!!! Nuts I know. We happened to be looking at fire departments in the lower 48 & Brad said lets look up Boise. We did & low & behold they are hiring in 2010. He will be going down in May to take a test. If he passes the test then he will fill out the application. It is a different application process then Anchorage, but just as stressful. It is scary to think that we could be moving, but still it is a ways off. We thought about it & know this is a path that he needs to pursue. If he does make it, the academy is 4.5 months & then he is on probation until his one year mark. I will not go down or sell the house until he has completed the 4.5 months of training. Mostly, because anything can happen. He could brake his ankle & there we are in ID trying to figure out what to do. Brad's response to that is: There FedEx in ID. I laughed. But that is going to be our big project on 2010. If he make it, I picture myself being in AK for at least another year & half. We will continue to pray for a baby & hope that it happens soon. <br />We know the Lord has his hand in all things & are very grateful for Him. We excited for what 2010 brings us & we will continue to update you on our comings & goings. We pray that you have an amazing 2010.AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3218740036380815553.post-71590229523376823862009-11-26T11:15:00.000-08:002009-11-26T11:31:17.999-08:00Happy ThanksgivingIt wouldn't be Thanksgiving if I wasn't thankful for something. Here are a few things I am thankful for.<br /><ul><li>Life here on earth. </li><li>A Heavenly Father who loves me</li><li>My faith</li><li>The serves men that serve our country so that I can have a great life here on earth</li><li>My free agency. </li><li>My family. They are fantastic. Especially my amazing nieces. They are the best.</li><li>Brad's family. I couldn't have asked for better in-laws.</li><li>My job. Even my patients. Even though they drive me nuts at times, without them I wouldn't have a job, let alone an interesting job.</li><li>My health.</li><li>My challenges of not being able to have child. I LOVE the time that I have with Brad. </li><li>Adoption. Can't wait to meet the wonderful birth parents that will one day make Brad & I parents.</li><li>My dogs: Lucy & Abigail. They help me cope with not having children. They are the coolest dogs in the world. I love them. </li><li>Quilt group on Thursday. I have meet the best people there & they are such great friends.</li><li>Facebook. Yes. It helps me stay in contact with friends from all different parts of my life.</li><li>My house. It is small but it is great. Cozy & perfect.</li><li>The Book of Mormon. It has helped me in my life more then any other book EVER written.</li><li>President Thomas S. Monson. A living prophet on the earth. Wonderful. He is such a great man. Thank you.</li><li>My parents. Who have given me everything & has asked for nothing in return. </li><li>My brother. Mostly because he has made me an aunt to those amazing girls. And for being a great big brother:)</li><li>My friends who deal with me & all my wonderful slips in life.</li><li>That Henry is doing well & is with his family for the holidays.</li></ul><p>Mostly I am grateful for all that I have been blessed with. I know I don't thank Heavenly Father enough for the blessing in my life. But I am thankful. I couldn't have asked for a better life. He loves me & I am thankful. I have a great family. Don't get me wrong I have fun times that happen, but they are fun times so matter what they are. I love my husband and thankful for him, he is the man in & of my dreams. Thank you to you all. Happy Thanksgiving everyone:):)</p>AK Thomas Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15242188334099895448noreply@blogger.com1